This week, the discussion of the full law to combat violence against women and more particularly articles 227 and 227 bis of the penal code, gave rise to debates on the sexuality of minors.
Is a minor entitled to a sex life? At what age is it ready to have sex? Can he really consent to sex? At what age to fix the sexual majority? Here are some of the questions that have been asked.
The answers were diverse and the opinions very shared. Those who think that minors have the right to a sex life, those who are completely against, those who just prohibit it from girls, those who sacralize virginity, those who refer to modernity and progress, those who cling to traditions and religion … In short, there was everything and its opposite.
The law has decided. According to the new article 227 bis of the penal code, minors do not have the right to have sex, neither with adults, nor between minors.
If a minor, girl or boy, has a sexual intercourse with an adult, it is a misappropriation of minors who is liable to 5 or 6 years of prisons depending on the case, the sentences that can be doubled for certain categories of adults.
If the minors have, between them, sexual relations made, they are referred before the children’s judge in accordance with article 59 of the child protection code.
Some have rejoiced. For them, no, minors are not entitled to a sex life. No, it is not in our traditions and it is prohibited by our religion. And then the risks are too large, these minors cannot assume and face the consequences.
Okay, minors could not assume and face the consequences. But is it by prohibiting the sexual relations that we could help them?
Is it by prohibiting sexual relations between minors and making these young people appear before a judge, that we would be able to solve the problems that could arise?
Surely not.
You have to be realistic. A law has never prevented young people from having sex. Never. In no country and any society. Not to my knowledge at least.
Perhaps this decision to have sex between minors, rather than being the responsibility of the law, should be the responsibility of minors and their parents?!
I repeat, you have to be realistic: more and more teenagers have sex with each other. Some in view of their families and others in secret. Some being aware of their actions, others not.
And then, was a minor who decided to have sex will give it right because the law prohibits it?
Surely not!
He will simply not respect this legal prohibition, especially if it seems liberticide and unfair.
So instead of prohibiting, why not try to encourage these young people to make the right choices? Why not show them the way while teaching them to be responsible? Why not make them aware of the consequences and risks linked to their decisions? Why not arm them so that they can assume?
Isn’t it the role of parents and school to educate children and teach them life?
It is obvious that a good education protects much better than a law!
It is necessary that at home and at school, sex is not a taboo subject. You have to talk about it again and again, so that it is perceived as a normal and natural act. Especially to do a prevention work and avoid problems that may arise from ignorance.
Explain to young people feelings, love, sex, differences and similarities between girls and boys, virginity, reproduction, risks of unwanted pregnancy, means of contraception, abortion, sexually transmitted diseases, dangers, means of protection and even the rules of our society, taboos … while trying as much as possible to avoid prejudices.
Assrar Al Banat film poster
By reading all these statutes and comments on the Internet, I remembered an Egyptian film which perfectly illustrates these words. Although, the height of irony, this film which talks about young adolescents and their problems is prohibited for under 18s!
This is the film Asrar Al Banat (Girls secrets) written by Azza Shalaby and directed by Magdy Ahmed Aly in 2001.
Asrar Al Banat tells the story of a young high school student, Yasmine, who will find herself pregnant without even having understood what he was coming from, not knowing that what she had done with her friend is a sexual relationship.
Yasmine is the only girl of a nice couple who did everything possible to surround them with love and educate her well. She is a good student and serious. Only this couple is conservative and is very modest. At home, we don’t talk about sex, we don’t touch each other, we don’t kiss …
Yasmine lives in this sweet family cocoon, with mom and dad who do everything they can to protect her from outside. They even decided not to install the parable to preserve it, it so young and so innocent. And when she poses questions about life, on religion, on God, on the way children have done, her parents answer her that she will know later, when she is an adult.
Yasmine therefore grew up in this very loving, but so prude environment.
So prude, that when she had her period, she was afraid. She hardly knew what menstruation were.
“When I had my period for the first time, I was ashamed, as if I had made a mistake and I had to hide, as if I was the only girl in the world to which it happened. I had heard that the mothers spoke to their daughters and explained to them, but mom told me the bare minimum, and as I was not used to chatting with her, I was afraid. I wanted it to stop quickly to be able to lock it in my room or in the bathroom. I was dead with shame ”.
Frequent Yasmine A high school for young girls. Far from boys and temptations.
But…. There is Shady the little neighbor. The two teenagers meet in the street, go on foot together to their high schools.
And one day, when the parents were absent, Shady visits his little neighbor. Adolescents discuss, are together, they are good…. And without doing it on purpose, without deciding anything, without thinking, without realizing….
When Yasmine realizes that she is pregnant, she is amazed, she does not understand, how was she pregnant, she had done nothing?!
No one had ever explained to him. Neither at home nor at school. It is true that the professor had tried to give them a course on human and animal reproduction, but he flouted and was so embarrassed that he had not finished the lesson …
When Yasmine finally confided in Shady, he was as lost as she is. He didn’t know what to do either!
“After 3 months, we understood and tried to get rid of it but we had not known. It was a nightmare from which we could not wake up. I wanted to close my eyes and open them and realize that all of this was not real ”.
They had consulted a gynecologist who had advised them an abortion, but the price was so high for them that they had to drop.
For several months, Yasmine had hidden her pregnancy, had bandaged his stomach, had wore loose clothes…. And one night she had given birth, alone, in a bathroom. And had a hemorrhage …
Parents were landed. They were themselves overwhelmed by events.
I would not tell you the end of the film, I prefer that you watch it, it is on the internet and I will share it at the bottom of this article.
Yasmine’s aunt in the film has put her finger on the problem: “Maybe we couldn’t protect you?” Had she said to her niece. And she was completely right.
Neither parents, school nor society had been able to protect Yasmine. Nor Shady either.
When you separate girls and boys, when you consider that sex is a taboo subject, when we refuse to answer questions from young people, when they are not confident, when they are not explained to them, when they are not shown, when their readings, their films, their leisure time … We do not protect children. On the contrary, we deliver them to themselves. And that’s where they may trip and fall. And the consequences can be tragic.
It is not the law and the ban on sexual relations that will preserve children. On the contrary, it is thanks to sex education that we can prevent unwanted pregnancies, abandoned children, infanticides, illnesses, forced marriages of young people….
Asrar Al Banat is a very beautiful film to see and see again. It could perfectly serve as a support for discussions and debates with young people. Why not program it in high schools and various clubs?
Neïla Driss
You can see the film here:
